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No Hymen, No Diamond. No Problem!


If there is one thing the internet has taught us, is that there are lots and lots of strange people in the world — strange people with access to broadband. There are folks who genuinely believe David Icke’s idea that the world is controlled by lizard overlords; Obama birthers and conspiracy nuts of all kinds; women without fiancés, or even boyfriends, who’ve already planned every detail of their weddings; Macklemore fans; thousands of aggressive trolls; and then there are the MRAs.

I’ve written about MRAs before, but if you’ve managed to remain in blissful ignorance of them until now, I’ll give you a brief primer. MRAs or Men’s Rights Activists, are not activists in any real sense. There are definitely men’s issues that need addressing and highlighting, such as the high rates of male suicide, prostate cancer, male victims of rape and sexual assault, or the narrow definition of “acceptable masculinity” found in our culture. MRAs don’t care about these things. Instead their whole schtick is that women are evil harridans who will happily ruin a man’s life on a wet Wednesday afternoon because they’ve got nothing better to do.

MRAs believe that the average woman, particularly in the West, spend her youth riding the “cock carousel” then marrying some poor beta male when her looks begin to fade. She’ll then deprive him of all his worldly goods, either by divorcing him for no reason whatsoever, or by pumping out multiple children, as if women were not truly human and can impregnate themselves without a mate, like snakes.

MRAs come in all kinds of flavours. There’s male separatists or Men Going Their Own Way who supposedly want nothing to do with women, yet spend much of their time talking about the fairer sex. There’s deadbeat dad Paul Elam who campaigns against child support and who allegedly ditched his wife after she was raped, ignored his daughter for years, and lived off his girlfriend while creating his site A Voice For Men, in which his claims that women just love to drain the financial resources of men. Then there’s Roosh V and his Return of Kings crowd who are supposedly all rugged alpha men who spend their lives knee deep in pussy and in fear of false rape accusations, while advocating to make rape legal if it happens in a man’s home.

Some MRA sites are so preposterous you’re not sure whether or not they are serious or engaging in high level trolling. A case in point is Dick Masterson (ho ho) and his Men Are Better Than Women page — sample reasons: men have illegible handwriting, and men wear watches. And finally, the latest group, No Hymen, No Diamond.

No Hymen, No Diamond is a new Facebook group . The group has over a thousand fans. Here’s a recent post: “The average American woman is an attention whore constantly posting selfies, cheating on her boyfriend or husband, rationalizing her promiscuous behavior with her other slutty friends who do the exact same thing, has no goals or ambitions, has no personality, has no sense of morality or responsibility to behave properly, and has her head stuck up her ass.” Charming!

The group advocates virginity for women, but plenty of premarital sex for men. It also suggests you can check the virginity of your new bride by aggressively inserting two fingers into her vagina — which not only won’t tell you anything useful, but is essentially rape.

There are lots of misconceptions about virginity and the hymen. First off there is no reliable way of testing whether or not someone is a virgin. The hymen may or may not be present in a woman who never had penetrative sex. It can be torn riding a bike or horse or using tampons, and it can still be intact in a woman who has had multiple sexual partners. The hymen doesn’t cover the entire vaginal canal — if it did, young women would not be able to menstruate — but is a stretchy membrane. The reason some women bleed during their first sexual experience is more likely to be nerves and inadequate lubrication instead of the hymen tearing. What’s more, if someone has never has good old P-in-V sex, but has had plenty of oral or anal sex, can he or she really claim to be a virgin? Nope!

In some ways, the No Hymen No Diamond chaps are doing the rest of us a favour. If these men are holding out for a grown up woman who is not only a virgin, but an attractive, kind, decent human being who wants to marry a man who spends his time on the internet bitching about “sluts”, well they’ll be waiting a long time. No women with any self-respect wants to be with a man who disregards her personality, intelligence, achievements, education, sense of humour, life experiences, and all the many things that make up a complete person, but sees her value — or lack thereof — as wrapped up in a tiny, immaterial membrane of skin.

No self-respecting woman wants to be with a man who is completely stupid either, and since their sign actually reads: No Hymen, No No Diamonds, there’s an excellent chance these guys are not the sharpest tools in the shed.

Here’s another sample post:

“According to a source close to the White House, Donald J. Trump loves our page too! He loves it so much in fact, that when he is elected as president he is considering a $500 tax break for every like or share you deliver to #NoHymenNoDiamond’s fan-page! Talk about Making America Great Again – One like at a time!”

Hmmm… I don’t think so. Posts like these, which are so divorced from reality they have surely got to be satire, makes me think that No Hymen, No Diamond is a troll page. At least I hope so. But even if it is, the people following the page may well take it seriously. It would make me angry if it wasn’t so sad.

My Body – Your Body … Erotica is BACK

No, not the song by Madonna (though that’d be a good place to start), but the leading ‘adult consumer show’ based in London. Having taken a brief sabbatical to dream it all up again, the new look Erotica is scheduled for Friday 25th – Sunday 27th October in the uber-cool Tobacco Dock in the East End.
Promising the latest in the world of adult lifestyle and sexual well being in an accessible and atmospheric setting Erotica will feature not just the hottest sex toys and the sexiest lingerie, but all fabulous stage show’s curated by Torture Garden and the likes of Yasura, Marie Scarlet and Miss Miranda (featured below) will be appearing over the weekend.
It won’t stop at the show though with after parties planned throughout.

For further details go to


Hmmm… I can’t think of any erotic novel I would like to read less than one starring myself. But if you feel differently U Star Novels is giving men and women the chance to star in a personalised erotic tale. The choice is between a vampire themed story or a Regency romp. U Star asks for personal details such as hair colour, favourite music, food and your tastes in lingerie to make the novel more authentic, although it is hard to see how vampire shenanigans could ever strive for realism. The books cost £24.95 for a paperback and  £14.95 for an e-book.


A YouGov has found that almost 80% of UK adults with children living at home are against the idea of a default internet porn filter. The UK government is seeking clarification on people’s views on three possible systems of regulating online adult content. The Opt-In option would block porn but allow adults to opt-in for it; Active Choice would allow users the choice of having filters and blocks installed; Active Choice Plus would merge the two, blocking some sites automatically but allowing users to have these unblocked if they so wish. While the survey suggests most adults are not keen on filters, a petition demanding that internet service providers block porn has attracted around 110,000 signatures.

Product of the Fortnight: Play Delight

The Durex Play Delight vibrating bullet is an ergonomically designed clitoral stimulator that can be used solo or with a partner. It’s discreet but powerful and uses AAA batteries, which are replaceable – so there are hours of fun to be had. Better still, it is waterproof so you can use it in the bath or shower too. Nice. All this for just €10.60.


It’s hardly a surprise that those who feel happy discussing their sexual needs with a partner have more satisfying sex lives, but now research from Cleveland State University in Ohio suggests that talking during sex has benefits too. Elizabeth Babin, the study researcher, recruited 207 people to complete surveys about sexual communication, sexual satisfaction and the amount of non-verbal and verbal communication they used during sex. Babin found that communication during sex was linked to greater satisfaction, but those who used non-verbal communication were even more satisfied. Babin posits that non-verbal communication may be seen as safer while telling someone you are enjoying yourself may seem too direct. According to Babin, sexual communication is a “skill” but “we’re not well-trained in that skill.”


Shrinks do like classifying every aspect of human behaviour so I guess it’s no surprise that therapists have divided extramarital affairs into six types. Here they are.

• Protest:
Prompted by feelings of rejection or abandonment in the hopes of having emotional needs met.

• Attention seeking:
An attempt to ‘test’ a partner by using jealousy; may be caused by the need to feel loved and important.

• Burned out:
The primary relationship has been emotionally unsatisfactory for a while.

• Romantic escape:
To avoid dealing with problems in a relationship.

• Hedge Fund:
Due to feelings of worthlessness, you may be prompted to hedge your bets by having a second relationship.

• A Power Player/Compulsive Affair:
Sex is used as a means of coping with stress and may be compulsive rather than pleasurable.


Australian parents don’t mind their offspring having sex, just as long as they don’t do it at home. That’s according to a survey of 500 parents conducted by the television station SBS. The survey found that 80% of parents thought premarital sex was acceptable but a quarter wouldn’t allow their child to share a bed with a partner.


The Philippines has outlawed video chat featuring “cam girls” who perform sex acts for online clients. The law specifically bans sex acts for payment and defines cybersex as the “wilful engagement, maintenance, control, or operation, directly or indirectly, of any lascivious exhibition of sexual organs or sexual activity, with the aid of a computer system, for favour or consideration.” Now there’s, ahem, a mouthful. Punishment is a fine of 250,000 Philippine pesos (around €4,600) and up to six months in jail. While the ban is ostensibly to protect young women forced into selling sexual services online, the Cybercrime Prevention Act of 2012 which came into effect on September 15, has a wide scope and someone found guilty of posting libel online can now face up to 12 years in jail without the possibility of parole.

Romney Vows To Tackle Obscenity

Republican hopeful Mitt Romney has promised that, if elected, his government will vigorously pursue obscenity prosecutions. America may be the biggest producer of porn movies but the country has some rather draconian anti-obscenity laws. Currently, prosecutions are rare, but Romney plans to change all that and his platform argues that, “laws on all forms of pornography and obscenity need to be vigorously enforced.” Porn insiders worry that ramped-up prosecutions will drive the industry underground and protections, such as mandatory health checks, will fall by the wayside.