I don’t like it – Valentine’s Day that is. The enforced romance, the cards, the stupidly expensive roses, the romantic competition – it just ain’t sexy. Bah humbug. But anyway, here’s some VD news.

Sex vs Chocolate
Asked what they’d like for Valentine’s Day, 85% of Canadian guys said that they would prefer sex to chocolate but 31% of women said that they would take the chocolate instead.

Hmmm… that might be because women who eat chocolate regularly have better sex lives, at least that’s according to Italian researchers. If you deprive yourself of this sugary snack for most of the year, no wonder it becomes so important on the days when it’s “allowed.”

As a compromise, I suggest the Chocolate and Strawberry Lovers Body Pen Set. Cover yourself in rude chocolate words and get her to lick it off. Easy! And cheap too! Just £3.95 from Amazon UK.

Porn for VD
Apparently porn is high on the wish list of men this VD. If your mate is into SM and bondage then try Silken Sleeves. Maria Beatty’s seductive film features bondage and SM play between two gorgeous women and picked up a gong at last year’s Erotic Awards.

Available to buy as pay per minute, streaming and download from Bleu Productions.

Forbidden Love: Police Target Thai Teens
Thai police plan to crack down on motels, shopping centres and parks today to catch teen lovers celebrating Valentine’s Day. Despite Thailand’s reputation for sex tourism the legal age of consent is 18. Authorities were alarmed by a poll that suggested that 27% of Thailand’s teens intend to have sex to celebrate Valentine’s Day.

Oxytocin: The Best Valentine’s Day Gift
Cards? Chocolate? Dinner? Fuggetaboutit! Oxytocin is yer only man. Considering the health benefits, sex is the perfect Valentine’s Day gift. Studies show that oxytocin helps people deal with stress. And stress, you know, is a silent killer. So if you really love the man or woman in your life, then a good long shag session is the best thing to give.

Last year Hot Press reported on the case of Steven Ryan who was refused permission by the Domain Registry of Ireland (IEDR) to register a site called porn.ie. Steven, not one to quit in the face of adversity appealed the decision but received a final “no” last week.
According to the IEDR, website addresses “must not be offensive or contrary to public policy or generally accepted principles of morality” but their remit does “not encompass the content that appears on .ie websites, the policies simply relate to the domain name itself.”Basically this means that IEDR can only rule on a name – for example if you wanted to call your site deathtoannesexton.ie they could decide that the name in itself was contrary to our generally accepted ideas of what’s right or wrong. Thanks IEDR! That’s fair enough, but this hardly applies to ‘porn’ as a word.Ryan then decided to apply for a site called pornography.ie. The term ‘pornography’ appears in any standard dictionary, does not incite hatred and is a term used by both those who are for or against explicit material.After over a year of legal arguments and appeals, the IEDR has stuck to its guns. According to Ryan, the IEDR seems to have interpreted “public policy” in the widest possible sense. Correct me if I’m wrong, but this seems to mean that the IEDR is now one of our official guardians of morality.Damn – bring back the church I say. Back in the bad old days at least we had public figures to rally against.

Bad news, folks. We are Europe’s most sexually frustrated nation – only 47% of us are satisfied with our sex lives. A quarter of us have sex four to six times a week, which is pretty good going, and presumably the rest are jealous!Irish ladies need to up their game though – 80% of men feel sex isn’t spontaneous enough. Put down that glass of wine, switch off the Sex and the City box set and do something about it, girls. That’s a very poor showing…Personally I am in the unhappy 53% at the moment, but that’s just because my lovely boyfriend isn’t here right now to sort me out. But that’s par for the course… Does anybody else get incredibly sexually frustrated when they are working? Or is that just me? Ho hum… Probably doesn’t help that I am working at home right now and have been looking at porn sites though…Talking of which, check out YouPorn. It’s basically a completely adult version of YouTube – mostly videos of real people having sex, and some hentai and 3D stuff as well. Vaguely addictive…