Category Archives: celibacy

Don’t Have Sex Ladies!

It sometimes seems that no-one wants women to be having sex. From Christian demagogues to dating experts, women who have sex before marriage or ‘too soon’ are told that they are sinners or sluts. Now an article in the August issue of the Journal Of Marriage & Family found that women who wait at least six months before having sex with a partner have higher levels of relationship satisfaction. Six months! Of course if you put yourself through six months of self-imposed celibacy, especially if you had a lovely potential partner all lined up, you are more likely to be a traditional, conservative sort of gal or perhaps just willing to overlook your partner’s faults rather than go through a second sexual drought. No such benefits were found for men, which means that’s going to be a hard sell.

The Celibate Question

Anyone here ever gone without sex for an extended period of time?

A post under my last entry complaining about doing sex without for two months got me thinking about celibacy. Many years ago I was celibate for almost a year, and not through choice really. It was a combination of various unfortunate circumstances, including a major illness in the family, that caused it. I guess I had other things on my mind…

A few months later when I tried to rectify the problem I seemed to be jinxed. Everyone I went out with revealed their freakish side to me before we’d had a chance to take things further. There was the guy who pulled a knife on me asking to drink my blood; the bizarrely sexist bloke who complained about the evils of feminism all through dinner; the racist who shouted at a homeless black kid who offered to ‘watch’ the car in exchange for some change (homeless kids are a common enough thing in South Africa sadly and watching or washing cars is how they get by); the one who spiked my drink (luckily friends were in the same club and took me home); the one who believed that the lights of a certain club revealed the innermost soul of a person and was fond of Celine Dion! You see my problem… I might have been getting desperate, but not that bloody desperate.

Anyway, that’s my sorry tale. Let here yours…