Someone asked me a question about sex after paralysis recently. There is no right or wrong way to have sex after a major reduction in mobility. Sex will be different, but people with disabilities can and do enjoy satisfying sex lives – it’s all about finding the approach that works best for a couple.

Here are some things to bear in mind:

Some disabilities can affect sexual functioning and the ability to orgasm. For people with reduced sensitivity, orgasm can become less about physical sensations and more about a state of mind.

Focusing on different parts of the body with sensual massage can help. Sensual stimulation and the feeling of physical intimacy are still important and enjoyable. It may help to change your expectations of what is a satisfying sexual encounter.

Depending on the type and extent of the injury, some men may have difficulty getting or sustaining an erection. There are various ways to deal with this including drugs such as Viagra, papavarine or alprostadil which are injected into the penis or vacuum pumps. It’s important to discuss this with a doctor.

Experiment with different techniques and positions to find what’s comfortable and what works for both partners.

Loss of mobility does not mean loss of sexuality. Counselling may be necessary. After a major illness or injury it can help to work through your feelings. It’s not easy to change your sexual persona from who you were before the injury, but with time and patience, many people with disabilities can have a happy sex life.

Research conducted by Kim Anderson, an assistant professor in the department of neurosurgery at the Reeve-Irvine Research Centre found that both men and women have the ability to develop new areas of arousal after injury. She suggests this may be due to “neuroplasticity” which allows the central nervous system to reorganize itself and create new ways of functioning.

With certain changes and adaptations, people who still have sensation in the genital area have the best chance of having a “normal” sex live. But, what is surprising is that people with no sensation in this area at all, can over time, develop new areas of arousal. The research is not yet clear if need and practice cause this or if the neural pathways rearrange themselves over time, or a combination of both.

Futher reading
Sexual Options for Paraplegics and Quadriplegics by Thomas O. Mooney, T.M. Cole, and R.A. Chilgren can be bought at Amazon UK

This entry was posted on Thursday, July 31st, 2008 at 10:37 am and is filed under sex and health. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.